Angel Li's
Toastmasters Journey
---From
Zero to Hero, Never Give Up on this life-long Journey 從高中的課堂上遇到國際英語演講會開始,中間經歷了恐懼、躊躇、自我懷疑、短暫放棄、拼死練習、重回舞台、進而找到價值,到現在漸漸能發光發熱。這是一段翻轉個性、價值觀、人生方向與職業選擇的旅程。跌跌撞撞,卻精彩不已。 |
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Angel Li's Toastmasters Journey:
Award: 1.DTM plaque
小時候的我是個極端害羞內向的女孩,鮮少使用自己的聲音與世界溝通,因此經常被誤認為是啞巴。與世界的接觸僅限於簡單的肢體語言,與人交談是我避之唯恐不及的事。
大學生活展開時,我於『杜鵑花節』社團博覽會中尋找課外生活的寄託。突然,一面金黃色的旗子吸引了我的注意力---『國際英語演講會(Toastmasters),一個讓你克服恐懼、在台上盡情享受英文公眾演說的舞台』。我心想: 真的會有人想選這種既嚴肅又可怕的社團度過美好的大學時光嗎?不可能!太難以置信了!然而我還是默默地拿了一張宣傳單回家,默默瀏覽他們的網路社課照片。發現不但很多人選擇參加這既嚴肅又可怕的社團,他們站在台上的模樣似乎都既享受又自信!難以置信!我就這樣默默地觀察了這個社團一年的時間 In a historical moment, I made up my mind to take action, visited them and took a look. “I want to know how these aliens look like!!!” I stepped into the meeting room, hid in the crowd, sat in the corner, kept silent and observed closely. Well, some of them were equipped with excellent English and presentation skills as I had imagined, but all of them looked confident, enjoyed and so willing to try on the stage!!! Almost every one, shined with confidence. This image really impressed me!!! I wondered “It would be awesome if I could stand on the stage radiating my charm just like them.” At the same time, an idea came into my mind and haunted me. "No~~~ We are different, I can not make it" 直到有一天,我終於決定要到場親眼看看這群外星人的模樣!我發現這群人的英文程度不見得個個都如我原先幻想的那般完美,但個個都在台上散發著自信與勇敢的光芒!這一幕,讓我十分動容。我忍不住想:『如果,有那麼一天,我也能像他們一樣站在台上閃耀著,那該有多好呢?』但我很快地打消念頭,因為,英文公眾演說是我永遠無法克服的弱點。
Despite my lack of confidence, I kept joining their regular meeting as a guest every week on time and enjoyed being a silent audience, for another whole year. Yes, a real silent audience. 但我依然對這群人深感興趣,所以默默地當個安靜的聽眾,準時出席每周的會議,度過了另一個一年的時間。是的,一個名符其實默默的聽眾!
遇到有人找我攀談,我沉默或尷尬地搖頭離去
遇到被點上即席問答,我使勁搖頭請主持人不要找我上去;若主持人依然鍥而不捨,我會嚇得逃出會議室、躲在洗手間直到即席問答時間結束。
遇到會員對我說:『看妳一直在幫忙大家拍照,但沒聽妳上台講過演講;何不放下相機、上台演講,換我們幫妳拍照呢?』這是我第一次聽到有人想聽我演講,內心雀躍不已!但我還是婉拒了。
Thanks to the disguised blessing, I eventually and accidentally joined TMs in year 2008. 直到我遇到我的mentor。『來,今天是繳費最後一天,有帶1700元嗎?讓我幫你加入會員,一起上台演講吧!』終於,我於2008年正式加入了台大國際英語演講會!
Standing on the stage and delivering a speech is an amazing experience. For a long time I had not heard my voice and not being focused by a group of audience, who nodded to show agreement, encouraged me by giving applauses and offering positive feedbacks. Gradually, I was attracted by and fell in love with the feeling, a mixture of excitement and fear on the stage. At the same time, I could not help but wondered : “Could I stand on the stage radiating my charm just like them in the future? Could I?” 備稿演講中,我第一次嚐到在台上被關注、被聆聽、與被了解的美好感受,那是我幾乎沒有體驗過的美妙經驗!我漸漸愛上那站在台上既緊張又興奮的感覺,開始大膽地想:我是否有一天也可以跟其他會員一樣,站在台上閃耀呢?
Then, I started to deliver individual evaluation (IE), a mini impromptu speech as a feedback to a prepared speech speaker, which was a huge challenge for me. For the first 5 times, I performed miserably and always apologized to the speakers after my evaluations. Even so, I still possessed a firm belief: “This is a stage allowing me to make mistakes and grow, I just need practices! I can make it one day!” However, at that time, I didn’t realize that was my first critical point in my toastmasters journey. 然而當我開始嘗試擔任講評員時,卻完全被這小型的即席演講給擊垮了!聽完一個講者的演講後,便需要於很短的時間內上台言之有物地發表建設性地評論,對於當時候的我來說,實在有難度!我往往都搞砸了,只能講評完後與講者尷尬地說抱歉。我不斷鼓勵自己,然而,我從未能想像到這是我於TM生涯中一個很關鍵的轉折點。
“Is she really a NTU student? How poor her English is” “Is she a new member? I think she is not qualified to be my IE” Sadly, I heard the rumors. That time I encouraged myself: “This is a stage allowing me to make mistakes and grow, I just need more time to overcome my Achilles heel and catch up with others. That is OK, everything will be alright once I improve” 我漸漸於背後聽到一些聲音:『這人真的是NTU的學生嗎?她的英文能力怎麼會這樣差?』『我覺得讓她擔任我的講評員好像不太適合,可以換別人嗎?』 我知道自己需要比別人還要多的時間來跟上大家,我也相信這是一個允許我犯錯與成長的舞台。我告訴自己沒關係,只要進步之後就沒有問題了,繼續加油就是了。
I would never forget the day I received an anonymous feedback sheet from audience after a meeting: “Would you please not ruin our meeting quality anymore?” That night was filled with tears, shattered pieces of confidence and my broken heart. I could not sleep. The words kept haunting me. Some ideas came into my mind.
然而有一天我終究還是收到了一封匿名回饋單:『可以不要再破壞我們的會議品質了嗎?』那晚,我徹夜未眠。
我怎麼會去相信這是一個可以允許我犯錯與成長的舞台?事實是,根本沒有人能等待我直到我進步。
我怎麼會去相信我有一天能克服我永遠的弱點?我生來就是如此地害羞內向,我與他人是如此地不同,不是嗎? 我花了這麼多心力才好不容易開啟我的旅程,但上天似乎在告訴我,我根本不可能辦到…
那晚,我的熱情灰飛煙滅,哭著離開了演講會。我依然默默透過網路相簿了解大家在做什麼,看他們依然笑得很開心,但我知道我已經不屬於他們。
One day, a sister club invited me to be a firefighter giving an individual evaluation (IE). Still not recovered from the devastating feedbacks at that night, I rejected them and replied, “Sorry, my IE might ruin your meeting quality. You had better ask others for help.” “Just come to our meeting and at least enjoy our snacks, we really need your help, do not be worried” their officer said. I went there and delivered a terrible IE as before. After I apologized for my poor performance, their officer comforted me with a gentle tone that “The time you spent with us is the best gift we received tonight, great job, welcome back next time.” The words ignited my desperate heart. 直到有一天被友社邀請去擔任講評員之救火隊,即便我告知他們我的講評可能會破壞他們的會議品質,他們還是熱情邀請我前往。在我一如往常地發表一場很不滿意的講評後,我與講者尷尬地說抱歉。這時他們的幹部溫柔地對我說:『不要擔心,妳今晚給我們的時間已經是最棒的禮物,歡迎下次再來』這句話撫慰了我原本萬念俱灰的心。
Encouraged by the words, I even asked their officers: “If it did not bother you, may I serve as IE for you at every meeting? May I have a second chance, please?” Since they also need many firefighters, they were glad to accept my proposal. From then on I visited them very often. At that lovely, warm and rookie-friendly club, I practiced the IE skills for up to 50 times in just one year. 我也問『可以讓我每周都擔任講評員嗎?可以再給我一次機會嗎?』。剛好該社也很需要援手,於是我每周都去該社練習講評。一年下來共練習了約50次。
In
another day, my mother club called me to serve as firefighter of IE
as well. At first, I was afraid the nightmare would repeat itself
again. Once I stood on the stage of NTU toastmasters club, I knew
immediately that I was totally different and had broken my comfort
zone. Later, NTU toastmasters staff told me, “Your IE increased
our meeting quality, welcome back!” Honestly speaking, the
feeling was quite complicated! While standing on the stage and receiving my first best IE speaker award, I found many new members down the stage. They all looked innocent and kind of shy. Probably, they also experienced some frustrations and wondered what their next step should be. Probably, they were also on the edge of giving up and doubted if their dreams could be realized here. Just as how I was one year ago. I wanted to tell them: I understood, I was willing to wait for you and to accompany you until you radiated your charm on the stage. I realized my responsibility here! I came back to my mother club and served a mentor of 13 mentees in the following years. By understanding the needs, thoughts and hesitations of a beginner on this journey, this is my first step toward leadership in TM. 當我有一天重回母社的舞台同樣擔任講評員時,雖然內心忘不了當初那份回饋單所帶給我的衝擊,此刻的我已經完全不一樣了。在台上領著於母會初次得到的最佳講評員獎時,我看著台下初加入的社員那青澀害羞與不確定的模樣,想著:他們是否也跟我一樣遇到那樣的困難與心境呢?是否有人陪他們走過呢?我突然好想告訴他們:『不用怕,你們經歷過的擔憂猶疑與害怕我全都懂,我真的了解,我願意陪伴你們直到進步以及終於能於台上自信閃耀的那一天!』我看見我的責任、找到我的價值、重回這個地方、先後擔任13位新會員的mentor、持續發光發熱。這是我悄悄邁向領導之路的第一步,也是我的全新旅程再次展開的一刻!
I often
told them: 在付出夠多努力之前,永不放棄! 如果練習五次講評不夠,何不嘗試五十次呢?
總有一天,會辦到的! 在看見自己終於進步之前,永不放棄!
特別是在曾經不看好你的人面前,使命必達,才不會有遺憾! 在找到一群需要自己與值得自己全力付出的地方之前,永不放棄!
當你找到你的價值所在,這一切努力都會充滿意義! I might receive another anonymous feedback sheet in the future, but this time, I know, no matter what happens, I shall never give up. 在你變成一個不會被挫折輕易打敗的人之前,永不放棄! 我不能保證未來不會在收到像當年那樣的回饋單,但我知道,未來無論發生什麼事情,我都不會放棄了!
After stepping firmly into the place and starting to fly in my sky, the next lesson was to persist. Experiencing changes of life phases in your toastmasters (TM) journey is a must if you stay longer. Graduate from school, find a job, change a job, be promoted, move away, get married, be parents, and others will surely happen one by one. So far I experienced 5 stages in my TM journey.
終於在這個旅程中站穩腳步後,下一個課題就是學著如何堅持下去。要在TM長期發展,必定會遇到階段性的轉變,可能是自學校畢業、找到工作、轉換工作、被升遷調職、搬家、結婚、為人父母……等等。而我在這其中至今也經歷了五個不同的階段。 Every change brought impacts to our lives, how to get through it? We might not be able to devote as much time and efforts as before, but just like in a marathon, our goal is the same, to finish it. You can adjust your tempo, your targets and your minds whenever needed, continue running on the journey! Let’s continue my stories. 每個轉變勢必都會對生活帶來衝擊,重點是如何通過它!或許無法像先前那樣付出那麼多的時間,然而這旅程就像一場馬拉松,只要確認目標沒有改變,調整一下步調、心態與階段性目標,便可以持續於此旅程中前進,直到有一天達標。
1.大學生活,忙課業、忙升學 2.碩士班生活,忙實驗、忙Seminar、規劃未來 3.開始第一份工作,適應全新生活 4.擔任Area Governor 帶領6個分會 + 擔任海大救援教練 + 擔任ASUS分會導師 + 執行高效能領導 (專案:Toastmasters Firefighters) + 工作上有非常多的出差需求 5.擔任Division Director 帶領4個Area、12~14個分會 + 工作上需指導5位成員
在大學時期顛顛簸簸地參加Toastmasters約三年之後,我正式進入碩班生活。面臨到實驗進度的壓力、為配合實驗而減少的時間彈性、跨領域研讀新專長需加倍花費的心神,讓原本下課後輕鬆參加校內Toastmasters的景況不再,漸漸有趕不上會議、不得不臨時延後或取消、以及演講準備不足夠就上台的情況。面對這樣的壓力,身邊的朋友與家人都覺得碩士班生活應該全力投入於實驗,並不鼓勵我繼續維持課後活動。而被忙碌包圍的我,也漸漸覺得力不從心。
However, I had a
crazy idea suddenly.
Why not just crystallize my pressures into interesting speeches and
share it to toastmasters? In turn, I delivered more speeches than
before. My fight with rats looked so much like jokes for others, and
they enjoyed them so much!! The feedbacks for my speech supported me
to survive my stressful master program.
研究所生活之另一個重頭戲是Seminar,一般來說是個沉悶而冗長的論文報告時間。而我也在此有個想法:若能把Toastmasters所學的技巧用於論文報告上以及問答上,碩士班生活會變得更有趣味!於是不同於其他同學站在講台後面平鋪直敘地報告完一篇論文,我選擇站在舞台前、使盡我從C5學到的Vocal
variety, C6的Body
language, C7的Research
your topic, C9的Persuade
with power,
以及眼神接觸和舞台自信來報告一篇論文。問答時,我也透過講評所學到的技巧來給予其他同學建議與提問!台下的同學與教授們無不瞠目結舌,不敢置信!
有了這樣的心態轉變,只要有講台的地方,就處處是我可以練習與發揮的舞台!從seminar到進度報告再到論文口試,每每為我的演說帶來亮點與魅力。從枯燥無味,到樂此不疲!Toastmasters點亮了我的碩班生活!
畢業後,我很快地開始了我於內湖科學園區的第一份工作。不情願地離開了參加了五年的、象徵我學生生活之精華與回憶的NTUTM。我加入Neihu
Toastmasters這個溫馨幽默又有活力的地方,開啟我另一階段的Toastmasters新生活。在工作上,雖然只是一個新手,我依然為自己設了一個五年內可以開始擔任junior
manager的目標。而在此之前,我盡全力主動學習、辛勤工作、把握機會讓自己成長。 機會很快就來了!在一場盛大的商務會議當中,原先預計擔任主持人的同事因為看到上百位的出席人員,突然太過緊張而無法正常表現。就在團隊擔憂活動開天窗的同時,我鼓起勇氣自願代替他上台主持。雖然完全沒有商務的實務經驗,我使盡了 Toastmasters 學到的TMF與 session master 技巧,從開場、各講者介紹、中間過場銜接以及最後的問答時間掌握,順利度過此難關!
Later, my boss told me that at first he was afraid that I would screw it up, but now he knew I was excellent at public speaking and host a meeting. Thanks to this event, my boss promoted me to be the junior manager. Thanks to Toastmasters’ lessons, I reached my goal, to be a junior manager in 5 years, in time. At that moment, my heart was fulfilled with delights and I confirmed that what I had learned in Toastmasters was truly a priceless treasure for both my work and my life. 會後老闆告訴我:他原本非常擔憂讓我一個新手上場主持全場實在太冒險,然而非常訝異我能有這樣的表現!經此事件之後,老闆讓僅有一年半經驗的我擔任 junior manager 的職位,就是我設定要於五年內達到的那個目標,我的內心欣喜若狂!這是第一次,Toastmasters之所學直接幫助到我工作上的表現!
TMs, a training course of skills needed by real world. Every investment in TMs will bring you surprises one day! I am so willing to devote much more time in TMs!!! 我深刻體會到,Toastmasters是真實世界中所需技能的綜合練習場! 每一分投資於Toastmasters的時間都將於未來某個關鍵時刻帶給我們驚喜! 想到Toastmasters帶給我的,讓我更加無怨無悔地全力投入於Toastmasters中! 無法停止!
因此我的下個階段,可說是Toastmasters旅程中的爆發期!且工作上所學與所需要與Toastmasters竟意外地非常類似且互相呼應!白天全國出差跑透透,晚上北台灣各Toastmasters Clubs跑透透!旁人很難區分我的工作與Toastmasters有何不同呢!
這一年讓我行程滿檔的角色與責任有: 1. 擔任Area Governor 帶領六個分會,初嘗Toastmasters中的領導角色 2. 擔任ASUS分會導師,初嘗協助分會建立的過程 3. 擔任海大救援教練,初嘗協助和我母會一樣是學生社團的海大學生 4. 執行高效能領導 (專案:Toastmasters Firefighters),初嘗於Toastmasters中開啟一個跨區的支援平台,救援各分會的拜訪次數非常頻繁 5. https://www.facebook.com/TMfirefighter/ 6.工作上有非常多的出差需求
這是非常精彩的一年! 第一次體驗到工作與Toastmasters的緊密結合與互惠關係! 於Toastmasters中付出愈多,對工作帶來的助益就愈大。 我更加願意付出心力於Toastmasters!
Serving as area A4
governor, year 2013~2014: 擔任了一年的Division A assistant governor後,後續我進一步擔任Division A Director,管理4個area、12 個分會與2個新創分會,擁有更多機會磨練領導技巧!而於此同時,工作上也獲得機會擔任管理五位成員的管理職。責任在於領導(Lead)、指導(Mentor)、教練(Coach)這五位成員。感謝有Toastmasters的薰陶,透過發表多場的講評、管理4個areas、指導新成立的分會ASUS、救援海大學生社團與完成高效能領導專案,我方能勝任這個管理職的機會。同時我在工作上擔任內部講師,正如我於此同時在Toastmasters擔任的workshop speaker(工作坊講師)、trainer(訓練講師) 等等一樣。工作與Toastmasters再次相輔相成,完美地結合在一起!
Serve as trainer / workshop speaker in sister clubs:
這也是我第一次與DTM前輩們一起排隊準備進場!!!
心情非常興奮!!!
回首最初的時光,一個連透過中文溝通都有困難的害羞內向女孩,從未能想像能於Toastmasters經歷這麼多的精采事物與在工作上獲得這麼多夢寐以求的機會!如果沒有遇見Toastmasters,我現在大概什麼都不是,一輩子對英文公眾演說避之而唯恐不及。而多麼幸運地,我遇到了,它戲劇性地改變了我的人生,如同從地獄到天堂。我是Angel,感謝上天,幫助我找到了我的天堂!就是這裡,Toastmasters! What’s next? I am not sure, one thing for sure is that I will never give up as what I have done throughout my from zero to hero Toastmasters journey. 未來會發生什麼樣的故事,沒有人知道。
唯一確定的是:在這旅途中,即使從零開始,我也永遠不會放棄。
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