Madam
contest Chair, ladies and gentlemen, I had a bad day at office. My boss
shouted at me, my customers picked on me and even my subordinates didn't
listen to me. Not only that, on my way home after work, my car broke on
the high way. But that was not the worst part yet. When I finally got
home at midnight, oh my God, it was our wedding anniversary, our 10-year
anniversary. I forgot all about it.
To my surprise, my wife, Ann, did not yell at me. She didn't even try
to call me. But I still apologized and promised that I would definitely
buy her flowers for our next anniversary. She said, “Don't worry. It's
ok.”“Are you sure about that?”“Of course I am sure. Don't be
silly. We have been married for 10 years. Who cares about some stupid
flowers anyway?”
That night I had to sleep on the couch. The next day, her sister
came over to speak with her for hours complaining about me forgetting
our
anniversary. I overheard some of their conversations. My wife said,
“All I wanted was for Andy to buy me flowers and spend a romantic
evening with me? Is that too much to ask on your 10th anniversary?
But
he has to wait until next year.” Her sister replied, “I don't blame you
one bit. If my husband forgot my anniversary, I'd break every bone in
his body.” I was confused. So I asked Ann, “Honey, I thought you said
it was ok.”
Do you know what she said? She said, “I say a lot of
things I don't mean, and I mean a lot of things I don't say. Everything
I say is not necessary everything I mean. You know what I mean?”
“No.” “Andy, you know what your problem is? You don't understand
women.”
I didn't understand my wife until a few weeks later I attended a funeral
of a good friend of mine, David, who passed away in a car accident in
his early fifty. It was a religious funeral, Christian style. And I
was one of the few guests who were invited to make speeches because
David and I had been so closed.
When it was my turn to speak, I
particularly mentioned how David had always been there for his only
child, Jimmy. He saw little Jimmy take his first step, showed him how
to ride on a bike and when Jimmy grew up as a big boy, David even taught
him how to date a girl. Watching him, I myself learned to be a father.
All of a sudden, it occurred to me that, wait a second, I had so many
good things to say about David but how come I'd waited this long until
he died. At the end of the funeral, people presented all the beautiful
flowers to David. Again, I thought I could have just given him the
flowers much earlier. I believe my friend would rather enjoy them while
he was still alive.
At this point, I seemed to finally realize what my
wife really meant. I seemed to hear her tiny little voice coming beyond
her words and deep down from her heart, saying, “Give me my flowers now,
not next year, not even tomorrow. Now.” How stupid I was not to hear
that voice earlier.
So after the funeral, I couldn't wait to see my wife. I rushed back
home and took her out immediately for an intimate candlelight gourmet
dinner with a terrific bottle of wine and dancing. Then I handed her a
bouquet of roses. Oh boy, you got to see her face.
Incredible! She
said, “For what?” I looked her in the eyes and said, “Nothing,
simply because I love you.” “Honey, I am so sorry that I was such an
idiot… forgetting our anniversary. I have been taking you for granted
for too long.” At that moment, Ann looked so pretty just sitting there
with flowers in her hands and tears in her eyes.
For the first time
in my life, I sensed how much a flower in time could possibly mean to
the people you love. When was the last time you heard that tiny little
voice from your spouse, your children or even your parents? If you use
your heart, not your ears, to listen, every now and then you can hear
this. “Give me my flowers now.”
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