I was only 6 years old when a neighbor gave me this beautiful doll.

You may not think it beautiful, but to me, it was the only doll I ever had.

I adored it. However, my father had a different opinion.

Contest Master, honored guests, ladies and gentlemen,
“Give it back. Give it back right now.”
“But Papa, it's mine. Why can't I keep it?”
“ Don't argue with me. Give it back right now.  Accepting gifts is easy, but repaying favors is very difficult.   Don't you ever forget this. Now give it back.”

That picture, and my feelings of loss and disappointment have been engraved on my mind since I was six years old.
　

However, it did not stop at six years old.

My mother and father never stopped reminding me of their philosophy -“Never accept favors from anyone. Paying them back will cause you endless pain  and suffering.”

You see, my father was born into a very poor family. 

Relatives and neighbors gave food and lent money to them, but they were always asked to return it.
　

My father always told me, “it's easy to repay the money, but it's hard to repay others' for their favors.”
I was deeply influenced by his philosophy.
　

But the belief was challenged when I went to college.
At college I was fortunate to live with my cousin, who was much older than me.

But, my cousin changed my life!
　

For 4 years, she took me to concerts, plays and museums. She paid my tuition for swimming, English, Japanese, history, literature and violin classes. She even paid for me to take 10 trips to other countries.
　

My vision was broadened, and my life was enriched because of her generosity.

However, I felt guilty, because I knew I was disappointing my parents.

The pressure I felt from them never stopped.

I will never forget these words,“If you insist on taking favors from your cousin, you are no longer our daughter!”  
I struggled and I asked myself, “should I follow my parents' commands or continue accepting favors from my cousin?”

I felt so confused that one day I sat down with my cousin, and I cried and cried.

This is what my cousin said to me.“Ruby, I have the ability, and I'm willing to help you.  If you need it, feel free to take the opportunities to learn and grow. Enjoy the experience and fulfill your life.
　

Always be grateful for what you receive, and humble for what you have.  Most importantly, be willing to give and share with those in need.  Pay it forward. Spread the good will around. Make life a virtuous circle.”The pressure from my parents continued, but I took my cousin's advice - I kept on taking classes and traveling abroad.
　

After graduation, I became a teacher of mentally and physically challenged students. These were children born into poverty. From birth they had almost no hope -- But I recognized that with some help, they could have hope -- I taught them to read and write. I took them to museums.
　

I bought storybooks, CDs and DVDs for them to enjoy. We also traveled together. I was so glad that I had something to offer them.Now, some of them are able to work to make a living, and they even help their families.
　

They were also willing to give and share with others in need. We kept the virtuous circle going.I want to conclude by saying this. I suffered 12 years of pressure for accepting favors. But I have never suffered from paying forward my kindness.
　

When people ask me how to repay a favor,  I say, “Pay it forward. Keep the virtuous circle going.”Recently, I received a message from my parents.
　

“Ruby, Happy Birthday!  We want you to know that we are so pleased and proud to have you as our daughter.”

It took 12 hard years to finally receive their approval, but it was worth…every minute!

Contest Master.